So last night I had a set in Orange County and it was one of the most interesting nights in comedy I've had in a while. Because it was my first time performing at this particular venue, I stayed the entire show. I sat through twenty comics. Twenty. That's A LOT of comics to sit through.

Nevertheless, it was oddly fascinating. Aside from a couple of women and a couple of Hispanics, all the comics were straight, white males--my friend Guy notwithstanding. How do I know they were either straight and/or in the closet? Because every comic had a gay joke (or two) to prove it. Jokes like, "I'm anally celibate. And by that I don't mean I'm anal retentive about celibacy, I mean I'm anally celibate." Get it? He doesn't have anal sex?! Here's another. "I write poetry. Just because someone writes poetry doesn't mean their gay. Now, if you write poetry with a c**k in your mouth, you're gay." Tee hee! By the way, I followed that guy on stage. My opening line was, "I write poetry with a c*** in my mouth and I'm not gay." In the comedy biz, that's called "pandering to the audience." I got a huge laugh. Cheers, in fact. For the record, though, the statement wasn't true. I don't write poetry.

But I digress.

I was mostly fascinated by the racism. Obviously, as a comic, I hear a lot of racist humor. When I need a good fix of it, I can head to the Comedy Store and get some. In LA, though, the racism is usually in the form of a pointed joke. I might not personally think it's funny, but I can at least see where others might. Or I can at least see what the comic's attempting to do.

Last night was different. I heard jokes that were both corny AND racist at the same time. Like if you took out the racist element, it would be the kind of joke where you'd roll your eyes and think to yourself, "This guy should keep his day job." But when you throw the racist element in, the joke takes on a whole other dimension. I can't tell you how many times my jaw dropped last night. Guy and I would look at each other like, "Did he just say what I think he said?" It was awesome.

I'm kicking myself that I didn't record the other comics. Here's my favorite joke of the entire evening. The guy was in his late forties, early fifties. He wore ill-fitted jeans (a common theme throughout the night), an Angels t-shirt and sneakers. Here it is:

I was telling my buddy that my wife is a big complainer. She never runs out of things to complain about. He goes, "A real nagger, huh?" No. She's a short white woman, about this tall.

Here's the kicker: This guy is a SCHOOL PRINCIPAL in Orange County.

I heard "dirty Mexican" bandied about. The context, "I could by oranges from a dirty Mexican." That part was a riff, with no actual joke attached to it. Someone talked about being really disoriented, as if on drugs or something, and the only thing he could compare it to were Asian drivers. There was also a punch line delivered with the obligatory Asian accent, "Why you no..."

The trip was eye-opening. To be fair, there were some girls at the next table who seemed shocked at some of the stuff that was said.

Hopefully no one from the show will stumble on this page. Also, many of the comics were really nice. A lot of them came up to me to say they liked my set. One of them invited me to do his room, which I plan to do if he emails me.

And I'll be doing the show again next month. Hopefully I'll remember to tape some stuff (for my own personal use, of course). I should point out, however, that there were some people who made me laugh last night.

Okay, all for now.

We are currently sailing from St. Petersburg, Russia to Helsinki, Finland.  It is 12:00 in the evening and I am on a floating hot bed of social activity.  The show just let out, A Singing and Dancing Salute to American Pop and the ship is abuzz with partiers mingling in a collage of languages, and spilling into the Coffee @ com Internet cafe where I sit typing this blog.

The man occupying the computer across from me keeps tapping the table assertively, throwing his hands up in disgust, nodding adamantly and emitting guttural noises.  He is either a) day trading b) engaged in an instant message dispute or c) downloading porn.  Wait, he just chuckled aloud and gestured wildly as if to grab my attention.  The answer is d) ordering online for a drink to be sent over to me.

I confess that I am happy to be leaving Russia.  St. Petersburg, although stunning in spots is also sad and dreary in many ways.  We saw magnificent palaces, museums and churches, along with worn, neglected neighborhoods, sour people, and despair.

Russian history is fascinating.  It was very dangerous to be a member of the royal family.  Most stories tell of how happy and productive some Tsar was until he was murdered.  For the Tsarinas, the fate is slightly less harsh.  They get sent to a nunnery.

Today we saw the palace where Rasputin was enjoying a lovely meal until he was murdered.  This was interesting to me for two reasons.  1) I've read a lot about Russian history and 2) I learned that if someone does not let you into the main house, but only brings you down to the basement, don't eat the snacks.  Rasputin, The Mad Monk, was poisoned and then shot and then shot again and then shoved into a river and any one of those things can ruin a dinner party.

The man accross from me is laughing again and attempting to make eye contact.  I can see his screen name from here, so I'm going to close now so that I can I.M. him my room number... Hold on... more wild gesturing, a lean back in the chair and a loud Hmmmpphh.  I'll save him for Laura.

Just a quick FYI, for God knows what reason, iTunes and other services have decided to offer podcast #6 as #7.

Since they have already been published, it is going to take some work to trick them into thinking that #6 is #6- and that #7 is #6.

At any rate, please bear with me while I try to iron this out. Check back with iTunes, etc in about an hour. In the mean time, don't download anything till 11pm PST. Thanks

Weezy and The Swish podcast 007

Listen to Laura chewing God knows what in your ear! After that, we have Weezy joining us through the wonders of teleportation and time travel. She reads more goodies from the Internet love letters and then both her and Laura offer their thoughts as to how they might translate into a real life situation. Later, Laura takes a stab at rapping to the ingredients of snack foods and recyclables. Plus, we have Laura and Weezy exploring testing possibilities for potential Chinese wives. All this and much more on Weezy and The Swish!

I am traveling on a cruise ship through the Baltic Sea.  We have most recently left the port city of Tallinn, Estonia and are currently sailing towards St. Petersburg, Russia.  Estonia was under Danish rule in the 13th Century before it was sold to the Germans following a mid-14th Century insurrection.  This did not bode well for the locals who suffered for centuries before finally winning back their independence in 1921, only to later come under Soviet rule after WWII.  However, the revolutionary atmosphere following Glasnost fostered renewed independence for Estonia which now happily hosts cruise ships and markets overly priced ashtrays and shot glasses.

My brother, Craig and I hiked all over the beautiful little city of Tallinn and wandered into a magnificent Greek Orthodox Church in the middle of a gloriously traditional wedding.  The bride and groom, bedecked in ancient ceremonial dress were being paraded in ritualistic circles as magnificent hymns floated up and echoed across the ornate cathedral ceilings.  It was absolutely spectacular.  I stood and watched in awe and wonder.  And then, we turned quietly in reverence, walked down the church steps and being who we are, “I said to my brother, “She could do better.”  And my brother said to me, “Do you think she had to get married?”

I don’t think people like us should be allowed to travel outside the country.

 

What's going on here?
The BX Radio Network is still being built from the ground up, however you can read all about it from this press release.

Now, I am sure that Weezy and Laura remember me saying that I was going to get the show plenty of press. Well, being part of the Internet's first podcast-only radio station is a pretty good place start I do believe!

Oh sure, there are a number of traditional radio stations that have converted to a podcast-only format over the airwaves. However, we are the first (to my knowledge) to provide a radio-like environment where people can tune into podcast content from their PCs thanks to a live audio stream. The podcast content will be part of the Cool Cast Radio brand. As time progresses, we may even looking at expanding beyond podcast content once things start to take off.

Indie Music Radio...
Having said this, KSSX has a great podcast format for indie bands that is definitely worth checking out. It is not a live stream, but rather a podcast ready set of MP3s that you can download at your leisure. I have been a fan for some time and love what they are doing.

As for the BX Radio Network, there is a very good chance that we will expand into this area someday. We'll have to wait and see. If we did, it would be with streaming content. I want to make sure that we are different. There is no interest in simply copying others.

Moving on...
Ever since I first heard that most podcasts are being listened to via the family PC and not portable MP3 players, teaming up with the folks at BX Internet to start this project just made sense to me. Think about it. Being able to either look up a particular show that we offer on a schedule or just randomly starting up the Windows Media Player to see what you stumble upon - there is a great potential for audio content discovery here.

I would also like to thank all of you who will be listening once we launch in September and give a special thanks to Laura's mom for introducing me to Peter Yanke of BX Internet in the first place.

Chris had an odd voicemail here the other day from the WB Network. While I am not interested (long story involving my ex and one particular talk show), I thought I would pass this opportunity on to you folks, our listeners...

Tomorrow I will leave American soil with my eye set on the Nordic horizon.  My sister and I will fly to Paris and then Stockholm from where we will set sail for the picturesque ports of Helsinki, Astoria, St. Petersburg and Copenhagen.  I will be attempting to blog from the ship and while the rest of the blogosphere is urgently discussing important topics such as the John Roberts Judicial appointment, and Karl Rove's FBI dealings, I will be blathering about my personal, trivial, travel amusements.  So, if your brain is too full of useful information, check in often for a refreshing load of fluff.

Note to neighborhood robbers: My seven attack dogs have tested positive for both Herpes and Rabies.  They are also trained marksmen and fully armed.